Kidney Omelette with Sweet Potato and Broccoli

I haven't updated this thing in two months. Honestly, it feels much longer. I feel like I've done a lot of paleo foodie stuff to say, but I probably won't even remember a quarter of it. Let's see... I've pissed myself off for not going to the raw milk farm when we went to New Zealand, one of the main reasons I went, I've done heaps more research about why we shouldn't diet (read: MATT STONE ROCKS MY SOCKS), I've bought two of the latest health bundles, I've given up listening to every.single.annoying. webcast webinnaire videos where people talk really slowly because it clogs my inbox, and I'm down to one drawer of bananas left in the freezer. Unfortunately, it's still pretty full, so I'm wishing for a cow for Christmas.

Some more, actually somewhat exciting things that have happened:

- My birthday! I woke up to the best birthday present - my first acknowledgement of a somewhat ok metabolism:

I also made a coconut oil pie and a watermelon cake to celebrate (oh, and an organic roast chicken) and I'll post a recipe for that later. Some day. One day.

- I bought my first pair of lululemon yoga pants. I feel like my life is complete. I never had a pair of proper yoga pants for the whole year or so that I actually trekked it out to the yoga place to die for an hour on Saturdays.

- I've fully cooked sweet potato vermicelli, and it's alright. It's just like thick rice vermicelli. Awesome.

- My ferments have actually worked! I lost hope in my many, many strawberry kvasses so I gave up, read about fermenting for a bit, and then stuck some cabbage and a cucumber or two in jars. And a bunch of asparagus in the St Dalfour's jam jars I've been wanting to ferment asparagus in ever since I saw them. And guess what?

THEY WORKED!! :D DELICIOUS BACTERIA FOR EVERYONE!!

Ahem. Moving on.

- I'm doing the HSC. So, in layman's terms, I have the right to stress every second of the day for the next 365 days, as of about last week (the end of the exams). And thus, I have woken at 4am the past few mornings, despite my copious banana eating. Humph.

- I had proper 'junk' food yesterday. I went to my friend's party (just a few movies with just a few friends) and they ordered pizza for dinner and honestly, it looked gross anyway so I looked like an anorexic while I said that I'd had dinner before I came (true story though). But the birthday cake came out and it was a passionfruit cheesecake and I was like 'you know what? I've already had butter twice today and I don't want to look like a restrictive twat who refused to eat normal food and Matt Stone says that junk food is good for you so...' And I grabbed the cheesecake slice that had been one of the first ones cut (my friend was starting to get them all messy). And so I took my cute little forkie and dug into the sweet cream cheese. And boy did it taste sweet. Other people said it was remarkably sweet as well, so it wasn't just me. And I started to realise what 'full' meant. It opened my eyes to feeling my stomach instead of feeling how much is left on the plate. And so I didn't want to finish the cheesy bit; I didn't want any more. And so my friend who eats everything, ate the rest :)

- I've fallen in love with awful offal. I hazarded taking the kidneys out of the freezer, and I soaked them for 24 hours before frying the teeny chopped pieces in a large amount of butter. Delish!

Which brought me the inspiration for this recipe :)

Kidney Omelette with Sweet Potato and Broccoli

2 lamb's kidneys, preferably from lambs who had previously frolicked in meadows

2 eggs, preferably from chickens who had dug up their own wormies for tea

about ten of those smaller florettes of broccoli that are at the top of the head of broccoli

a tennis ball size chunk of sweet potato (I never know how much sweet potato to eat)

as much butter as your inner dairy gods will accept as sacrifice

Half a grove of olive oil, to serve (or just a drizzle, to taste)

Freeze the kidneys, then take them out of the freezer for half an hour, slice lengthways, cut out the white bits and chop up the meaty bits into teeny chunks. Pop into a mug with water and a splash of apple cider vinegar or other vinegar, cover with cling wrap, and put it in the fridge overnight. Strain, then soak in plain water for another 4-6 hours (or until dinner time, if that's when you're having them). Strain and put them in paper towel to dry.

Bring a pot of water to a boil, chop up the veggies quite small, and add them to the pot. Cook them up until al dente/not overcooked.

Put half of your butter/fat in a fry pan, cook on medium so the fat sizzles and once the milk solids stop bubbling so much, add the kidneys, don't touch then for thirty seconds, then do the really cool chef flick-of-the-wrist move to toss the kidneys, leave them for ten seconds, repeat another two or three times, and then take them out of the pan quick smart.

Beat the eggs in a small bowl. Add them to the fry pan that was just cooking kidneys, in the rest of the butter if needed. Cook it low and slow - if it's quite thick, your pan is too small. It needs to be quite thin. Keep it frying on low until all the egg is cooked.

Strain the veggies and dry them. Mix the kidneys in with them, and pour the mixture onto one side of the omelette. Fold the rest of the omelette on top like a blanket.

Somehow transfer the omelette to a plate and drown in olive oil (or drizzle, or neither if olives aren't your thing).

Middle Eastern Meatballs

Walking through one of those family-run grocers where they have all the overseas products, mum and I picked up the za'atar at the same time and knew that it NEEDED to come home with us. I was imagining spicing all my meat with it, and mum was imagining dipping pita bread in oil and the spices. I did that too, only with a spoon instead of bread. (let's just say it's much more pleasurable to normal way).

I'd prepared to make some roasted sweet potato so I complimented the whole dish with a Middle Eastern flavour that I can never get enough of: cinnamon. I never thought of it as a spice to add to savoury dishes until I tried it at a restaurant once, and I've never regretted a dump dash FIX of cinnamon in a meal.

So I dusted my sweet potatoes with some of it, and got meatballs made and on the baking tray. Spooning over olive oil was a little weird. Next time, I think I might pan fry them to see if they stay moister, because all the olive oil leached out and into the baking dish. Oh well.

I tried a few without cinnamon, and they were probably a bit moister, and the za'atar was more obvious. But the cinnamon gave it a pretty crust and made it tie in well with the sweet potato.

I couldn't take photos because they were all gone before I knew it :)

Middle Eastern Meatballs

500g minced meat (I used pork, but lamb would be great)
1/2 cup za'atar
1/3 cup animal fat or olive oil (I used olive oil)
additional olive oil, for the outside of the meatballs
cinnamon, for rolling

1. Combine the mince, za'atar and fat/oil in a bowl.
2. Form small balls of the mince with your hands, then roll the ball in cinnamon until coated.
3. To bake: Place meatballs on a prelined baking tray, brush with olive oil and bake in an oven preheated at 180 degrees, for 10 - 15 minutes, or until cooked through.
4. To fry: Heat fat of your choice in a fry pan and add the meatballs, turning as each side cooks. Remove from the pan once they are fully cooked through.
5. Serve with other Middle Eastern vegetable sides, like some roasted cinnamon sweet potatoes, baba ghanoush LINK or some tahini.

Mayleo

...sometimes combining words doesn't look as good as it sounds. I was trying to come up with a cool title for this post and I ended up combining 'mayo' and 'paleo' in my head and came up with 'mayleo'...which doesn't look as good... Some things just don't mix well, like extra virgin olive oil and egg yolks.

My mayo actually worked, so that's not where I'm going. But one tip I'd love to throw out there: DON'T USE EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL. I used about 3/4 evoo, some macadamia oil and some sweet almond oil, because I read a thousand recipes saying 'don't use evoo' and I was like 'I can handle a bit of evoo'. But no. Even slightly diluted, just no.

And I didn't even use that much oil. But when I make it again, I'll make sure I have a bit more patience (and a lighter tasting oil) so that I can see what it's like when you use all of the oil. I only used a third of the amount.

Lonely Love Day

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Hope you all had a lovely day (see what I did there?). I should've really prepared for today but it didn't work out so I had no valentine at all :( but one of my gorgeous friends was handing out valentine carrots (she'd bought a bag of carrots and wrote 'Happy Valentine's Day' on them) and I got one. I felt loved then.

I've been playing with food ideas for the day of romance, so for breakfast I wanted to curl my bacon strips into a heart but, in my house, when we freeze bacon, it's cut into little square bits for ease of use. So a curly heart was not going to happen. I got out my heart shaped cookie cutter to try that before and after the bacon pieces had cooked, and I eventually gave up when I ended up with globby shapes of nothingness (delicious globs at that).